How to pick up a girl in 2022 — The ultimate guide
The big question is and remains how to flirt with a girl effectively in 2022 ? It’s true, girls today are independent, enterprising, they manage their home, their family, no longer let themselves be bamboozled, they are strong women who are no longer afraid to tell you your 4 truths from the first appointment.
But above all, how to flirt with a girl effectively live?
Because for many girls, they already make a selection upstream with websites such as Tinder or Meetic and therefore expect, when the confrontation arrives, not to be disappointed.
So yes, gentlemen, I understand you and I know how much pressure you have. That’s why I decided to help you through this article.
First, we will see in general “ how to flirt with a girl ”. That is to say, we are going to talk about the base. The ABCs of flirting. The pillars of the art of seduction.
Next, we’ll dive into the details of texting, facebook, and Tinder dating. So when you’re done reading, you’ll have a complete guide at your fingertips — and no more excuses to take action .
ARTICLE SUMMARY
- 5 crucial behaviors to adopt to flirt with a girl
- 6 basic techniques for flirting with a girl
- A simple catchphrase to flirt with a girl
- How to flirt with a girl by text message
- how to flirt with a girl on facebook
- How to flirt with a girl on Tinder
- CONCLUSION
Of course, as always I give you the first leads, it’s up to you to find your own technique and give me feedback on your experience.
So let’s go for express advice especially for you gentlemen.
What behavior should you adopt to flirt with a girl?
Before seeing how to flirt with this girl, you will have to focus on yourself, my dear.
You certainly know this saying “before loving others, you have to love yourself” and well that’s exactly what it’s about.
To hope to seduce a girl, you will first have to love yourself and have confidence in yourself . That’s where we’re going to start.
1. Have confidence in yourself
A woman senses when a man is confident or when he is hesitant and insecure. If you are in the second case, I prefer to tell you right away: your chances of picking up a girl are reduced.
Why ? Because a woman wants a man who knows where he’s going and who knows what he wants. A woman wants a man who has enough confidence in him precisely to be able to play his role of protector, among other things.
In other words, have faith in yourself. If you already have, that’s great and you can move on to the next step, but I imagine that if you’re reading this guide, you have a lack of self-confidence.
But the good news is that self-confidence can come with a little effort on your part. So to have confidence in yourself, take care of your mind, your physique ( masculine style ) and your stomach.
Make sure you have as many positive things in mind as possible and therefore meet as many positive people as possible who will help you with that.
Read, watch and listen to positive things be it books, magazines, TV documentaries, internet videos, music, podcasts etc.
For the physical, you will certainly have understood it, you must practice at least one sporting activity that you like.
No need to spend 3 hours at the gym every day of the week. No. On the other hand, you must be active for at least 30 minutes every day or 1 hour every other day, depending on your schedule. Why ? To keep your body healthy but also your mind (the two being linked).
As for the stomach, you will have to pamper it. Eat healthy and above all vary the pleasures. If you like to have a good pizza or a good burger, go there but choose quality restaurants that use quality products.
In summary, take care of yourself inside and out to feel your best and ultimately gain that self-confidence.
Don’t forget that it shows right away when a man has or doesn’t trust him and I can guarantee you that to flirt with a girl, it’s in your best interest to have confidence in yourself dear friend!
2. Highlight your passion or an area you master
If women like men who are confident in them, they also like them to be passionate and/or experts in one area or more.
Don’t panic dear friend, I can already imagine you racking your brains trying to find a new passion or a new subject to explore. No need to worry too much. Take stock of yourself and see what excites you, what interests you.
You found ? Perfect.
Now, you are going to have to make this passion or this subject your best ally to, precisely, share it with the girl you want to flirt with.
The fact that you are an expert in a field or that you have a passion will allow you to put yourself forward on a subject that you master. The interest?
Showing the lady that you are skilled in an area she does not know will arouse her admiration and allow you to flirt with her by having a head start.
3. Always have a positive attitude and no whiners
Would you like to flirt with a chick who sulks and never smiles? No, that’s what I thought.
Well for women, it’s the same. They don’t at all want to be hit on by a guy who sulks and who is always negative. Always have a positive attitude and no whiners.
It goes back to what I told you about in the part about self-confidence. If you’re positive and smiling, you’ll be much more likely to pick up a girl than if you’re in the opposite attitude and mood.
The flirt leaves no room for the negative so print it well dear friend because it is your smile and your positive attitude that will help you seduce this woman that you desire so much.
See life on the bright side and your glass half full rather than half empty. In the flirting phase, never have a negative attitude, whatever it may be.
Never say anything negative about yourself, or about Madame (obviously), or about your server. Nothing negative should come out of your mouth or body (for example, never cross your arms when you’re talking to your girlfriend).
4. Know how to be funny but at the right dose
Humor is a weapon of massive seduction provided you know how to make good use of it. Know how to be funny but at the right dose. Avoid at all costs fat jokes that talk about ass, alcohol or women in general.
Prefer anecdotes that concern you personally and that have placed you in sometimes comical situations. Of course, don’t talk about your drunken evenings that ended with your head in the toilet bowl… That will only make your friends laugh.
On the other hand, you could tell an anecdote like: “Last time, I went shopping. I wanted to take some oranges but I hadn’t seen that the bag was pierced so when I wanted to leave with my bag of oranges, they all fell back into their original bin… I thought I was a bit stupid but that made me smile. »
That’s all.
I took an example with oranges simply to show you the simplicity and lightness of the anecdote.
It’s a real situation that also puts you in the spotlight since you go shopping and in addition you eat fruit.
Madame will say to herself “ah, that’s good, he’s taking care of himself. “. And afterwards, this scene which could have embarrassed or even annoyed another man, well you, it rather amused you and did not prevent you from sketching a smile.
The girl will think that you don’t take yourself too seriously and that you know how to laugh at simple things, so it’s too positive for your seductive charm .
One important thing: never make fun of someone by wanting to put them down to try to impress the lady .
Women can’t stand it when a man makes fun of others and even less when he belittles a person in the hope of putting himself forward. She’ll zap you all at once so always be respectful and make sure you’re only laughing at yourself.
5. Always be respectful of yourself and others
Respect is essential to hope to flirt with a girl. Always be respectful to yourself and to others, including the girl you want to flirt with.
A respectful man will be more likely to seduce a woman than a disrespectful man. A man who knows the meaning and value of respect will always be more attractive.
Respect yourself by knowing how to assert your personality and not being influenced by anyone. You are a man and you must know how to hold your head high without ever disrespecting anyone or yourself.
Regarding Madam, always be respectful towards her and never have a word or a gesture that you might regret and that could ruin your flirting phase.
6 basic techniques for flirting with a girl
It is obvious that you are not going to flirt with a girl in the same way if she is in a bar or in an art gallery.
Likewise, all girls have different tastes and you will therefore have to adapt your seduction strategy according to the place, the moment and, above all, according to the girl.
But above all, you will have to show empathy to precisely feel when you do or say something that she likes or dislikes. Of course, the golden rule is to stay yourself, to stay natural , but while taking care of how the woman in front of you feels.
To know how to flirt with a girl, I offer you 6 essential points. No need to bludgeon you with a long list of things to do or not to do, I prefer to take you straight to the point.
1. Make good use of your gaze
Know how to look the girl in the eye without making her uncomfortable but while having a confident and reassuring look. Assertive to show that you have confidence in yourself and reassuring to put the girl in confidence.
Above all, don’t stare at her cleavage or her buttocks. Look at his eyes and only his eyes. If you want to take a look at her curves, don’t worry, she will give you the opportunity, especially when she gets up to go to the bathroom, for example.
2. Be playful
It’s important that you have confidence in yourself and that you can have serious topics of conversation but be playful.
Women love to be teased and besides, who likes it, punishes it well. Don’t overdo it and never be disrespectful, but know how to tease her to increase your bonding moments.
3. Master touch
You have to know how to touch a woman to flirt with her.
Master the touch by keeping one rule in mind, never touch her below her shoulder or upper arm, especially on first dates. You can, however, place a hand on his back to accompany him when entering or exiting a room. You can also touch his hand but without being pushy.
On the other hand, never touch his leg, buttocks or hips. But have physical contact from time to time to establish closeness between you and show your attraction to her.
Besides, if she touches you too, bingo, she likes you for sure.
4. Keep some mystery
Do not reveal everything about yourself and keep some mystery. If you want to flirt with a girl, you must absolutely remain a little mysterious to precisely make the girl want to know more about you.
If the part concerning you is much more complete, it is precisely because you are the one who has the main role in flirting with a girl. You will understand: everything starts with you.
5. Be an interested and interesting man
To be interested, you will have to listen . Ask open questions, questions relevant to your interlocutor.
Open — ended questions will open up a vast field of possibilities while giving substance to your conversation. You will become the guy who is great to chat with.
To be interesting, talk about your passions with enthusiasm, show what their interest is in your life, how they make you happy.
6. Make good use of “Storytelling”
It is the art of telling a story . With this technique, you will show that you love life to the fullest, that you travel, you are interested in lots of subjects… Also add a little touch of humor to your anecdotes to pass for a funny guy.
Get out of your comfort zone and live incredible experiences, approach groups in the evening, make new friends…
A simple catchphrase to flirt with a girl
Let me start by saying something super important:
Your approach should be honest.
For example…
My big weak point is stylish girls. When I approach a girl who has a lot of style, I let her know. My catchphrase is very simple:
“ Hi, I saw you earlier and I think your style is really cool. Your bag is super cute. »
In the example, I use her bag as a pretext but if she doesn’t carry one, then I’m talking about one of her accessories that is out of the ordinary, her haircut, her blouse…
I continue with:
“ I would like to invite you for a quick coffee for 15–20 minutes, if you have time, of course. “ »
If she tells me she doesn’t have time, I get her phone number .
It is a principle of psychology well explained in the book Influence and Manipulation by Robert Cialdini .
If you want to get something from someone, start with a big request. If the girl refuses your instant date , she will be more open to accepting a smaller request, or giving you her 06.
It’s like asking your buddy for $1,000. He may not want to give you such a sum. But if you ask him for help with your move next weekend, he’ll be more likely to say yes.
With this trick, you will get the girl’s number and moreover, she will not feel obliged to see you again.
This is my favorite approach, it works all the time and it’s very simple . Don’t complicate your life!
Don’t get stuck on the catchphrase.
The approach phrase is not important .
Approaching a stranger is not something common. Only confident guys do that . No matter what you say, be honest, keep it simple, and don’t complicate your life.
Try to find a detail about her that appeals to you. Personally, I compliment them on their accessories, on the association of the colors of their clothes because style is an area that I master and which allows me to hold a conversation.
You need to increase his level of interest in you because to him, you’re just a stranger . She has no reason to see you again to have coffee with you.
Be interesting and exciting!
You will increase the girl’s interest level through interesting conversations and anecdotes.
I often talk to you about open questions, those famous questions that feed the conversation by appealing to emotions. To seduce women, you have to make them feel emotions. That’s seduction.
Ok… ok… now that you know the basics of flirting with a girl, it’s high time to go into the details of the art of seduction. And to start, we will focus on:
How to flirt with a girl by text message
Right off the bat, I’d like to tell you… I lied to you. What ? Yes sorry.
We don’t flirt with text messages, we maintain contact and we cultivate the interest of our target in order to encourage future appointments. Are you disappointed? Too bad, because personally, I prefer concrete and physical exchanges rather than the virtual one which in the end brings more frustration than satisfaction.
But well, this being established, I will however not deprive myself of explaining to you how to maintain, or even develop your stature as a seducer through the use of what remains a safe bet, especially among the youngest.
The illusion of ease
You probably know why so many people use these famous mini-messages. They are accessible, easy to write and do not commit to anything, since they do not require any direct contact with your target. They therefore seem to represent a perfect tool for communicating.
Yes, but in reality, you will have to follow a certain procedure if you want your texts to be effective. You wouldn’t want to lock yourself into a screen relationship that would lead nowhere or challenge your charisma, would you?
Because there is the danger. The more you communicate using SMS, the less you make your interlocutor want to materialize a meeting. Why ? Because it will flourish in fantasy and imagination… Without necessarily wanting to go further.
The text message, the trap of the seducer?
As you will have understood, the abuse of SMS completely dehumanizes your relationship with a young girl, prevents you from analyzing her reactions and using your body language in your favor. This is the whole paradox of this means of communication: it is very easy to access, but also seems to be able to impact your image in a negative way.
Indeed, you can very easily demonstrate your desperation, your cultural shortcomings and your lack of distance vis-à-vis your situation by misusing SMS.
If I dwell extensively on the risks of texting, it’s because I’ve often heard this kind of reply: “ Hey, look at what she sends me, she’s hot, I’m going to squeeze her…. “To finally see this guy stay on his end after weeks of” flirting “. Far from the seducer detached from the relational issues of such a situation so…
How to write a seductive SMS?
First of all, be aware that even if the number of characters allocated to writing a text message is limited, this should not prevent you from expressing yourself. The texting language is to BAN! Why ? Because it is often incomprehensible and shows a big, big lack of maturity.
You don’t want your target to perceive you as an uninteresting guy who spends his life in front of a screen or who doesn’t speak his native language, do you? Grammar, spelling, syntax, punctuation… Are much more powerful than a “lol” or a “lmao”.
So please read it again and be careful with your choice of words! Does it limit you in terms of content? So what ? It’s not a book you’re writing, it’s a MINI-MESSAGE!
Always keep in mind that even if the meaning of your message seems clear to you, errors in interpretation are always possible. A text message does not have intonation, so it is much more difficult to convey emotions in it as you might in speaking.
So never forget that your charisma also depends on the way you write. The repetition of spelling mistakes greatly damages your image as a seducer, an active and intelligent man.
“ Yes, but if my interlocutor writes without taking care of her text messages? “. Well that doesn’t change anything. You will maintain a correct level of writing and this will even allow you to quickly be perceived as a serious man, idealized by your target.
The role of SMS in dating
Seduction is largely based on the development of a charismatic personality and on the perception that your interlocutors have of you. The text message does not allow you to objectively develop a warm contact with them or even to analyze their reactions to adapt your speech, so it seems logical that it cannot be used as a basis for your communication.
It is a simple complement, allowing you to maintain an already existing link, but certainly not a “tool” of seduction strictly speaking. In summary, texting should not be used to set up a date , or compliment your target.
What you want is to create an expectation, a desire on the part of your interlocutor to contact you. Thus, you will not be able to systematically respond to your target when they contact you in this way, or bombard them with text messages.
With this in mind, you should refrain from commenting on the sweeter messages you receive. A girl who tells you “I’m thinking of you”, must simmer on low heat, so that it turns into “ I need to see you again, right away!” “.
The more you respond in a way that shows your affection, the more you jeopardize your flirtatious status.
Your interlocutor must be in expectation, doubt and perpetual questioning in order to reinforce her interest in you: “ Why doesn’t he answer me? What could he possibly be doing? Maybe he has someone else? »
Examples of SMS to flirt with a girl
This is where our article will take a concrete turn. I’m now going to give you some sample text messages that will allow you to follow the process described so far.
Let’s start with a specific and very common example: you have met a pretty girl, talked to her, the contact goes really well (you may even have kissed) and you want to continue to maintain this beginning of a budding flame.
Rather than locking yourself into endless SMS exchanges, you will have to distribute the information in dribs and drabs. So we forget the “ you’re super cute I can’t wait to see you again “ which would show you as dependent on her will (what to do if she doesn’t answer you?).
In a few lines you demonstrate your sense of observation, implicitly diffuse the idea that you are thinking of your target and show them that you are taking your time to address them.
The goal is to tease your target, to stay light without ever showing that you are actually trying to seduce them. Evidence is in this specific case, your enemy.
how to flirt with a girl on facebook
Facebook is cool for keeping in touch with friends and for posting vacation photos, but it’s also an excellent place to seduce girls.
Ok but how to REALLY flirt on Facebook? That is the question.
It’s not enough just to send a message, no no, you have to pay attention to many other details that will be decisive in the seduction phase. You don’t see what I’m talking about? Don’t panic, I’m coming.
We are going to proceed in stages guys and if you are attentive to what I entrust to you, then you will finally know how to really flirt with a girl on Facebook.
Profile picture
Guys, opt for a natural profile photo that highlights you. NO selfie, NO duckface, NO shirtless, NO photo of your cat or any other animal besides you! Also avoid the group photo with your friends (this one, you can, at the limit, put it in the cover photo) because your profile photo must show you and only you.
love status
You have the choice between two options: single OR no status. The single status announces the entry color. Why not, but hey, it’s not imperative.
For my part, I prefer to put no status because it leaves room for mystery and it also shows that you do not spread your private life on Facebook (very good point that!). I recommend that you put no status like that, if the girl is interested, she will have to find the answer and it will help you in your approach to seduction (she will also appreciate your discretion).
spelling
Oh guys, watch the spelling! Nothing worse than a profile with lots of mistakes or messages with capital letters when they have nothing to do there… Worse still: the texting language… Leave the texting language to teenagers who are still looking for themselves but, for please, guys, don’t violate our magnificent French language which deserves to be taken care of. Your spelling should be perfect and capitals only where they belong.
The friends list
A word of advice: hide your friends list. The idea is not to hide to hide but rather to keep some discretion on your list of friends. Anyway, no one has any interest in seeing who your friends are (except for the curious and the “no life”) and if you have any in common, they will appear and that will be more than enough.
Also, if you have a lot of friends, it’s better to hide them to avoid getting bad publicity with the girl you’re interested in…
If you come across a curious girl, it also prevents her from going to scrutinize all the FB profiles of your friends or, worse, of your exes (if you are still friends with them) and that she comes across posts that she does not shouldn’t see right away…
Information filtering
Be careful not to reveal everything about your profile. Leave some information visible or even some photos but not all of your profile. You must keep a part of mystery (always!) to make the girl want to know more. Maybe it’s her who, by the way, will ask you as a friend before you do?!
Filter your info friends, filter! Be the mysterious man that the girl will want to discover!
Likes and comments
Go easy on “likes” and comments!
Even if the girl is super hot in a bikini on a heavenly beach, do not react, especially if you are in the beginnings of seduction. On the other hand, you can tell her in a private message that she is very pretty in this photo but without overdoing it! You must not appear “no life” or hungry.
Always be polite and collected. So no “waaaaa how beautiful you are pwa pwa * smiley in love *” but rather a “you look very pretty in this photo! without smiley!
How to really flirt on Facebook: we take action!
Here, once you have respected the previous points, you will be able to take action.
Whichever girl you decide to flirt with on Facebook, don’t just send her a private message saying “hi how are you? and letting him do all the work for you!
Several options are available to you, but let’s take an example: if you go to a friend’s party and he happens to be a mutual friend, wait until the party to get in touch directly with him before talk on facebook. (Small wink: you can even send her a little private message DURING this evening but don’t hang on your phone and you will see the next day if she has answered or not).
Otherwise, wait until the evening is over if you haven’t been able to talk to her live and use the evening as an excuse to start a conversation with her.
I still advise you to have a first contact with her, direct or indirect, before contacting her on Facebook.
What does it mean ?
Direct contact = speak to her directly if the opportunity arises.
Indirect contact = you participated in a common event (evening, exhibition, festival, birthday, etc.).
This is the major condition to be able to really flirt on Facebook because if you don’t know this girl at all, you will pass for a hungry person and she will be suspicious so you will not have the right to make mistakes and it will put you more unnecessary pressure.
Now, let’s say you had a first direct or indirect contact with her.
Start by sending her a private message first, but don’t send her a friend request!!! Why ? Because you will pass for a big curious and also because you will give her access to your information far too soon! Take the time to chat with her, naturally and without putting pressure on yourself.
If she is receptive, she will make the conversation last. Otherwise, persevere BUT don’t obsess over this chick. If you have stuff to do, you will answer him later! Do not always respond tit for tat.
It’s that simple.
In the end, you must above all take care of your profile because THAT is what will have a decisive weight in your game of seduction.
As for the messages and exchanges you will have with her, you just have to stay natural and get to know her like you would with a girl live.
Always keep a part of the mystery so that she wants to know more about you. Do not reveal everything to her from the start and I also advise you not to add her as a friend on Facebook before having met her face to face.
If on the other hand it is she who asks you as a friend, wait a little before accepting (example if she asks you in the morning, accept the afternoon).
Don’t wait too long either because she’ll think you’re not interested and/or want to play with her.
The watchword: calibration.
By respecting the points discussed in this article, you will stand out from the 90% of Losers who harass girls on Facebook.
But never forget it: Happiness is in the street .
Go out and approach strangers and, above all, get out of your comfort zone.
It is critical.
How to flirt with a girl on Tinder
Tinder is the seduction app that works right now. Final point.
Whether you’re looking to hook up or find true love … you simply can’t ignore Tinder to pick up girls.
So I made several videos and I wrote dozens of articles on the subject… but if I have to share a single secret ingredient that allowed me to have my 798 encounters with all pretty women, it will without a doubt be the fact of distinguishing myself , with brilliance or even elegance, from other men .
And I would also add the fact of leading an interesting and stimulating conversation with the young lady who interests me.
And who says Interesting conversation, says: Interesting questions .
So today, I’m going to share with you 5 open-ended questions to ask on Tinder so you can have a cool conversation that eventually lands you a first date with your princess.
Note: The questions I’m about to share with you can also be used as Tinder catchphrases . It’s up to you to adapt them.
The first question to ask to flirt with a girl on Tinder:
“If your life was a Film, what would the title be? »
Great question to spark the girl’s imagination and start a good conversation. The idea here is to comment on the choice of film and tease it right behind. If she tells you that her film is Sex in The City, then you can say something like: “so we spend our days shopping in the morning and crying in the evening with a jar of Nutella while treating men bastards ;)”
Whatever his choice, always try to place a little joke and, above all, avoid responding like an idiot with “ok cool”
Don’t be silly.
Then, question that I like and which joins the first question:
“What movie made you cry when you were little? »
Most girls will say “The Lion King.” I don’t know why, but 75% of the girls I asked this question said the same thing. What’s good about this question is that it strikes an emotional chord with the girl — and whoever says emotion, says seduction. You make her travel. You carry it. You offer him an adventure ticket to his childhood — O dear childhood. Hello nostalgia.
Now that you’ve stood out from the Losers who start conversations with “Wesh Cousine…” it’s time to get down to business. The following question aims to reverse the roles. You will tell him:
“Are you here on Tinder often?” Do you have a lot of Matches? »
The #1 concern for girls in all things flirtatious online is men, players, and fat seducers who fuck anything that moves. Some women are not interested in womanizers at all, and so, in order to filter out all those Casanovas, the girl asks this same question from the start. But when YOU do, you turn the tide — you take it the wrong way, and you position yourself as a Gentleman looking for that rare gem. Diabolically effective.
Then, in order to prepare the ground for a possible first meeting, you will ask the following question:
“What do you do when you’re stressed?” Rather party or watch Netflix? »
No need to draw a picture here. If she tells you to party, you’re going to ask her what her favorite places are. If she tells you Netflix , you will ask her for her favorite series. Just hello.
Then we have as a 5th question:
“If you had to spend 5 million dollars in one day, what would you do exactly? »
This question is intended to filter out Losers. As a Gentleman, you don’t have time to waste with boring girls. According to her answer, you will know a general idea about the lady. If she answers you “LOL I don’t know” I advise you to delete it and move on. If she tells you that she is going to invest in real estate, spoil her family, and book a dream trip for her and all her loved ones… BINGO… You have won the jackpot ;)
Conclusion: It’s up to you
As you have understood, 80% of the answer to the question how to flirt with a girl effectively is played out in the first minutes of your meeting.
Yes, gentlemen, these ladies need to dream, to be reassured, to feel unique.
They don’t need a German tourist in checkered shorts and his socks sticking out of his sandals to play heavy humor on them while watching a trickle of ice cream drip from his mouth.
No, no, no and no.
They too had a complicated year, between telework and celibacy. Today, they rightly want to be treated like ladies, with respect. They want a good-looking, clean-cut, good-looking guy to make them laugh and behave like a gentleman .
Honestly, it’s totally understandable. So if you want to flirt with a girl effectively, remember to look neat, show her respect, speak properly while keeping an interesting game of seduction.
Have a reassuring attitude towards her. She needs to be able to feel safe, but also feel like you’re in control. Don’t play the irresponsible kid she can’t count on. After nearly a year locked up at home, she certainly doesn’t need an immature kid but a real guy.
Come on guys, you have all the cards in hand now to flirt with a girl effectively in this summer of 2022, so good luck and above all don’t forget the key word of your challenge, respect yourself and respect her.
Do not hesitate to leave me a comment to share your experiences.
