Free couple: are you really ready to break monogamy?

You probably know the rumor that free and libertine couples last longer than traditional relationships.

In the era of Netflix which propagates polyamory through its original productions, open relationships are no longer taboo.

They are even sometimes put forward as in the series Sex Education .

Even Will Smith and his wife Jada Pinkett are rumored to be a free couple this summer.

But behind the fantasies of freedom and threesomes, a study published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science reveals the reality .

What is a free couple?

But first of all, you need to understand what exactly a free couple is.

A free couple is a loving relationship, where the two partners agree to be a non-monogamous union.

More precisely, the two partners are in a relationship, but accept that the spouse has romantic or sexual relations with one another.

In a free couple, it is therefore sexual exclusivity that is banned , but not romantic exclusivity.

The notion of deception and of being cuckolded is therefore perceived here totally differently.

Clearly, what is serious is not to fuck with another, it is to have feelings for another.

Couples who ban romantic exclusivity therefore do not practice polyamory : that is another subject.

Free couples can be fans of swingers (libertinism = sleeping with other partners together, at the same time), but this is not always the case.

The agreement of the free couple can thus relate only to sexual relations with an outside person, but out of the sight of the principal spouse.

In short: we love each other, we forbid ourselves to fall in love with someone else, but we have the right to kiss elsewhere.

We say it to each other before, after, or not at all, it is decided together, it is discussed.

As in the film Indecent Proposal , where a billionaire offers a couple $ 1 million in exchange for a night with the woman: (he is also one of our favorite openers of opinion …)

The results of the study on the free couple published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science

Finally, this study shows astounding results regarding rumors about free couples.

First, the researchers in this study found that participants who had initiated an open relationship were more sexually satisfied .

Nothing surprising: it’s cooler to have access to all Delichoc, Pepito, Dinosaurus rather than eating only Granola every day (even if we love Granola)

But the researchers also noticed that the participants of the free couple were neither more nor less happy with their relationship.

Their level of love satisfaction was similar to that before their open relationship.

This study therefore concludes that opting for a free couple increases sexual satisfaction, but not necessarily the love satisfaction of spouses.

In short: in a free union, sex is better, but the level of love is not impacted, neither on the increase nor on the decrease: we love each other as much in a free couple as in a monogamous couple.

So why do some couples enter into a free relationship?

I personally had several experiences in the libertine environment and I tried the libertinism as a couple .

Women eager for new experiences and pleasure, contacted a friend of mine for threesomes.

Like a good gentleman and a faithful friend, I have often accompanied him in these original reports.

But that’s when I found out that many of the women we slept with were actually married women.

They came to let go, to enjoy, and to satisfy their fantasies behind the backs of their husbands without their knowing it …

You are probably wondering why.

The reason is simple: their husbands weren’t listening enough to them.

These women wanted to live intensely, discover and be sexually satisfied. Sometimes to test hard fucking.

Knowing that they would never do anything crazy with their husbands , they would live their fantasies behind their backs.

It was the only way for them to be sexually satisfied, and not to leave their husbands out of sexual frustration.

A bit like in the intro scene of the Ozark series , with the spanking scene (no spoilers…)

Because yes, one of the main causes of divorce is sexual dissatisfaction.

But if from the start, these women had entered into an agreed free relationship, they would not have needed to lie to their spouses.

Free couples allow greater trust in each other through honesty.

They also allow better listening, because both partners are less afraid of expressing their sexual desires. The fear of being judged for what you want is less oppressive.

If you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, you know that breaking the routine is not easy after years of sex with the same person.

And it is precisely here that the open relationship has a useful role, since it allows you to continue to develop sexually.

Finally, it makes it possible to remedy sexual incompatibilities within the main relationship.

Do you love sodomy but your girlfriend hates it? With an open relationship, you can indulge your passion with another lady, without any worry of conscience.

Even if the open relationship has several advantages, keep in mind that it also has its risks …

The risks of a free couple

In addition to the libertine experience I told you about, I had another that I will describe to you.

Because yes, I happened to sleep with a girl in a relationship … in front of her boyfriend!

The most incredible is that I was not the only one to sleep with this charming young lady… We were two guys to kiss her under the eyes of her lover.

But her boyfriend was happy and excited, only watching his girlfriend having fun. I do not judge, each his delirium.

This man is what in libertine circles is called a candaulist.

But on the other hand, I know that very few people would stand to be in his place (including me).

Would you, for example, be willing to let your girlfriend get fucked in front of you?

Probably not.

Because accepting such a thing and separating love and sexuality is not something simple and spontaneous.

Accepting being a free couple requires psychological strength and a totally different way of thinking from the norm.

And a level of self-confidence, and a confidence in others that few humans manage to achieve.

Without these two things, the open relationship can be very bad for the couple.

If you are naturally jealous, this kind of relationship can not only cause your relationship to end, but can also destroy and traumatize you completely.

So if you have the curiosity to try an open relationship, be careful and be aware of the risks.